Squeaky Voice Fan T-Shirts

"Go on, breath in the helium from the balloon, you'll sound all squeaky like me..."

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

-"What has this got to do with communication?" -"It's my invention...the hand smiley."

Cat and Broom

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

"The people will not tolerate people speaking on behalf of the people any longer!"

Beachy Hair

'I think they make my feet look too small.'

"Okay, now this time just start chasing the squirrel instead of asking it to dance."

"It took years of vocal training, but I now have a vocal range from squeaky right down to tenor..."

"At least she got it to squeak when she tripped over it."

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

"...and this is Sheila. She's my main squeeze."

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

A servant unfamiliar with his mistress's voice

Parts of a Bagpipe

'John's animal impressions are particularly good. He not only does the sounds, he does the smells as well!'

Only a handful of people are this small.

"Can we cut across the park and avoid Colony Lane? There are three squirrels in an oak tree I’d like to avoid."

Communication on a bus

The Red Cat: Lights/Red Cat Humour/Rhyme.

"...and the dish ran away with the other dish."

"I don’t know if this is just the cashews talking, but I find you absolutely delightful."

'That's curious, Mr Van Der Pummen...up to question 2084 you seem entirely normal, but then after 2085 you suddenly go to pieces!'

'If you don't stop playing that thing I'll go crazy.'

'Good evening! The debate continues over the idea of horse whisperers...'

"I've got this phobia about paying bills...."

'When I said I like face to face meetings, I meant on Skype.'

'I wonder if cowboys wear pumps?'

'Your father refuses to get a job. He lives by the motto, 'If we're broke, don't fix it.''

'Hey, Mr. Jones. I'd know that voice anywhere!'