Sporty Lawn Simplified T-Shirts

Al's Garden Supply vs. Joe's Sporting Goods

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

The very noisy, but enjoyable game of Crowquet.

'The grudge match.'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

Three different categories of lawnmower.

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

The Scottish Lawn

Beware of the Lawn

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

Mower Repair

Rich Man with Lawn Mower followed by Maid with Hoover.

"Yes!"

No Croquet

"Larry's taking a victory lap around the crab grass before putting the mower away for the winter."

Mowing the Jungle

A bowls player bowling a bomb

Mohawk Yard.

'Still haven't given up on your lawn, eh, Pertzborn?'

'To peeeEEE, or not to pee... That is the question.'

"No plans set in stone yet, but I'll probably spend some time getting on my wife's last nerve, maybe hyperfocus on the lawn."

That lawn maintenance gizmo is advertised to have 101 uses. Leave it to Fred to find 102.