Spooky Tale Collector Mugs

Floods leave man and ghost stranded.

"Kids, you may have heard something, but there are no such things as ghosts."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"It's a cow thing. You wouldn't understand."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Wicca Heritage Centre: Hansel and Gretel stayed here.

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

Fairy Library - Cinderella Marries the Prince

"Define fair."

7 More Dwarfs

Rapunzcow

"Once, I tried to change the laces, and the Landmarks Commission came down on me like a ton of bricks."

'That's my weird Uncle Benny. He claims that he was abducted by aliens in white lab coats.'

Fairy Library - Hop o' my Thumb Title Page

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

"No, I don't think you 'new break shoes', I think you need new break feet. You are supposed to depress the brake pedal you know."

"One blackbird pizza?"

Alice in Wonderland - Alice Meets the Cheshire Cat.

"I hate to spoil your porridge, but your son has a blonde in his room."

"When they assured me the solar panels would look like crackers, I said "What the hell!"'

"I forgive you, Bumpty."

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

'I can't believe this: We spend all our time hiding from humans, but they keep on publishing stories about us anyway...'

'I've been knocking for ages!'

'-but the fire's on the GROUND floor!'

'If you cut back on children, at least try to eat them before they nibble on your house.'

William Tell in his younger years.