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Lots of collections at a church service

Beggars on the street.

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

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'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

"Nice sermon. Not too preachy."

'Your late husband requests a status up date on how his stocks are doing...'

Church of divine healing - Emergency Room.

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

"'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?"

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

Angel ties a blindfold on a jet

"I think the vicar's taking things too far."

"Artie, you would not believe what’s going on down there."

Zen and the Art of Skiing

'You seem to be in good spirits.'

"It's true we like our members to be regular givers, but irregular givers are certainly welcome."

"Surprise!"

"Pack me a lunch Mom, I'm off to the mission field."

'How come I never see you in church?'

Spinoza

Golfing Fakir.

'Your baptism will bring you closer to God!'

'We really should talk about how time constraints preclude applying the skills we were taught, to deal with spiritual distress, but I have to run.'

'And in conclusion, I'd like to say - it's been a pleasure talking to you.'

"Neither Confucius nor Lao-Tse nor Buddha can help you. You either have a knack for chopsticks, or you don't ."

'Inflation hits Saint Thomas's'

'Homer!'

'Nice to have the rank and file picket with us.'

Today's Sermon: "Keeping the faith in a stock market correction."

'I was doing a lot of good, but then the funding ran out.'

"You can offer a pledge, but not IOU's."