Spiritual Slugger Pillows

Monks Playing Cricket.

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Golfing Bishop.

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"All this pitching and hitting- I'm convinced there's a deeper meaning to it all."

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Show off."

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

The Giamatti era

'What I've learnt sitting on this mountain, alone for ten years, is how boring sitting alone on a mountain for ten years is!'

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

"The meaning of life, eh? Beats me... Let's google it."

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

Baseball Dreams

2pm meet your Creator

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

"I cried because I had no shoes, till I met a man who had athlete's foot."

'If you can't control your temper,sister,you shouldn't be playing this game!'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

'I understand the Adirondacks are where it's REALLY happening.'

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

Sport, Political, Religious and New Yorker Cartoonist Gurus.

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'