Spin Master Pillows

"Half empty because of congressional inaction, and half full because of the tireless efforts of the President."

"My leaving Wilkins & Jennings was perfectly amicable. They felt that I should be fired, and I agreed."

"You're suffering from defective media image. What you need is a spin doctor."

'But on the positive side, money can't buy happiness - so who cares?'

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"Rather than monopoly, we like to consider ourselves the only game in town."

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

"Ever read about a politician who didn't need the press?"

Politician has inout box labeled 'spinspun'.

If you think it will help, yeah, lets hear your spin.

'It's tough being a media exec. There's always the threat of good news breaking out.'

'Draft a press release. ... Say Mr. Buck was not 'yanked'. He, in fact, removed himself from the mound in order to spend more time with his family...'

"Recommended by 4 out of 5 congressmen, Senator."

"He asked me the time, what do I tell him?"

"I'm John Lyezalot and I approve this distortion of reality."

"In that speech, forget that line: are you better off than four years ago?"

"Wow! That's a mean curveball."

'This is Miss Pavlovna — she's our new Vice-President in charge of spin control.'

Vote - SpinSpun.

"We think you could gain much wider support simply by re-languaging your bigotry."

'That was the most spins I ever saw anyone do!'

'Are those 'pre' or 'post' spun figures?'

'Seven spins! You lose again.'

"Whatever the results you get from an election it's important to be able to present them in the best possible light..."

Now I'd like to depart from my prepared text and speak from the heart...

"I work in PR where I provide a dynamic and highly effective bespoke service that can work for you and blah blah blah ..."

“Pottery Classes – Give it a Whirl!”

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'