Spell Master Pillows

"What's this Artificial newt's tail? Instant toad urine? No wonder your spells suck!"

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

Newt sale

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

'Darn! I can never remember witch one it... darn!'

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

Witches of Instagram

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

“Pottery Classes – Give it a Whirl!”

It's from the homeowners association --- They want me to stop leaving my worries on the doorstep.

"At least she's reading."

Witches at a cauldron.

"Gosh! Look what he's done to his Harry Potter books..."

'I really love this stuff, but I still have a lot of trouble with sushi.'

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

'She could've given me a point or two for originality.'

"By the way, does anything other than 'trouble' rhyme with 'bubble'?"

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

"I work in PR where I provide a dynamic and highly effective bespoke service that can work for you and blah blah blah ..."

Hexercise.

Holy Ronald Reagan. Do you see who's come into the cafe? Reagan? No, it's Johnny Spinwell. The king of spin! Who? Consultant to politicians, stars, lawyers, corporate execs. No one finds the bright side like Johnny. Pea brain, you stepped on my toe. I got your circulation going to save your heart.

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

"I can't use this. It's past its spell by date."

'Side effects include, headache, dry mouth, muscle fatigue and turning into a frog.'

'But on the positive side, money can't buy happiness - so who cares?'

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"It's the witching hour somewhere."

"Wow! That's a mean curveball."

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

My Cauldron Rules

"Melisa! - Your spelling is atrocious!"

'Mum, have you seen my pet lizard anywhere?'