Speech Improvement Seeker T-Shirts

'In an effort to speed things up, you may leave out all of the 'uhs' and 'you knows'''

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Ban on Free Speech

Inclusive speech

What's normal?

Dialogue

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

MLK

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

Twitter censorship

"A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something."

A. Lincoln, President. The "of the people, by the people, for the people" part is great, Abe, but the "people who need people" section may be overkill.

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

'I've never seen anyone lip-sync a speech before.'

'Sir, you inaugural speech is simply wonderful. I would just suggest you say 'dear employees' instead of 'hey, you bunch of lousy slaves'.'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

'I'll try to keep my remarks brief.'

1874 - Winston Churchill was born at Blenheim palace

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

'Vote for me because my Super PAC raised lots more money than my opponent's Super PAC.'

Dove of Peace and Free Speech

Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

Freedom Book.

William Pitt the Elder

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

"Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission."

'Vote for me. I'm ready, and willing. Two out of three isn't bad.'