Spectacle Wizard T-Shirts

'Now that's what I CALL a spectacle case.'

Rhapsody in Blue.

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"Baldo, you're a very good artist! You should put your talent to use."

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

'Personally I think one great improvement to these tea dances would be some tables.'

Newton's Cradle Solar System

'31 years in graphic design eh, so I shouldn't be surprised you've retouched your photo on your CV.'

It is believed dear Jack finally figured out women. Trouble is, he died laughing before he could tell anybody.

"Name your sources."

'Excuse me, it's 1-2-3, 1-2-3, not bum-tit-tit, bum-tit-tit!'

Where did you learn alchemy? Elementary school.

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

Woman dancing with a hot water bottle.

'With this organ transplant, you may find yourself doing a lot of thinking with your heart,'

"And for my next trick, an evidence-based strategy!"

"So your successful fantasy novels are based on your own experiences....can you elaborate on that?"

"I still say they've overdone the anti-aging CGI."

"When did this game get started?"

Club DJ.

"Looks like something exciting is happening in R&D."

Johann Strauss II

"This big eraser? It's for graphic novels."

'Congratulations, its a six pound audio technician.'

Physics: Unified Theory. Luftkopf's work on string theory is all tangled up.

'We realise that your speciality is heavy metal...'

'Don't worry, the first 30 years working as a sound engineer are the hardest.'

"No, I didn't plant a magic bean. I genetically manipulated the seed."

"He's done it your majesty! He's turned lead into a screenplay!"

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

Magnifying glass on Oculist's sign.

'Dad, you have to understand me. . . when I realized he was not prince Charming I was already in love with him.'