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'I've gone over the fight tapes and I think I've pinpointed your weakness.'

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Duel in a wheelchair.

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

Academic Affairs: The Chair of Philosophy Corners the Chair of the Sciences

'Are you sure you saw my client do it? Let me remind you, it takes one to know one.'

Musical Fight

"Ohhh... He's out all right!"

Attorney Punching Bag

Nature vs. Nietzsche.

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Department de Philosophie

'When are you gonna get me some real competition?'

Cat boxer

A poison pen fights a poison mic.

'One pundit tonight is from a think tank, the other writes 'Books for Dummies'.'

"I've been thinking harder than you have, and my thought experiment disproves your thought experiment."

Bar bouncer resumes.

'What do you mean, 'you can read me like a book'? You've never read a book!'

'Remind me again darling - what were we just arguing about?'

'What you look at it? You want a piece of me, is that what you want?'

'I say it doesn't matter what you believe as long as you're sincere.', 'Who do you think you're kidding?'

"I'm a hunter, gathering isn't in my job description."

'Can't we have just one conversation without you getting so defensive'

Chi Kick

'Let's give him a couple more minutes, but it looks like we've got ourselves a bum who can't fight his way out of a paper bag.'

'Joe Louis was right - you can run, but you can't hide.'

'I say, Addison

"You have defamed me, sir. I challenge you to a cage fight in Las Vegas!"

World Ping-Pong Federation.

"In this corner, a man who describes everything as 'Orwellian.' And in this corner, a guy who loves saying 'Kafka-esque!'"

Historians' Tiff