Space Travel Humorist Pillows

'Mars will have an oxygen atmosphere within six months. We just sent a payload of Kudzu there.'

Other than the countless probings, how would you rate your stay with us?

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

Save Our Universe

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

Astronaut: Pay and Display Only

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

'That must be the guy from corporate.'

"Most of our procedures are out of network."

'OK, who stuck that wedding confetti star on it?'

"The Webb telescope can look FAR back in time to before things were a bit s**t!"

Black Hole Corks

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

Chalk Bored

After our sun sheds the last of its energy and collapses in on itself... ...after the solar systems degraded, their planets flung out and consumed... And after those billions of stars in their billions of galaxies are all slowly snuffed out one by one... ...and after the last of the supermassive black holes evaporates... A single last question will remain, drifting through the long, cosmic dark... To renew your universe, please update your payment details.

Stand up comedians from outer space.

"Houston....I've found the 'Plank Constant'."

"Yes. I'm 100% sure it's your turn for a moonwalk."

'Russian scientists have determined where the meteorite than injured 1000 people came from. Thet say, 'It's not from around here.''

"What do you use to relieve the burning and itching of asteroids?"

'Deploy the Candarm and ready the Canafinger.'

NASA HEADQUARTERS, ACME VACUUM CLEANERS, 'Hi! - I understand that space is full of junk?'

'I come from. . . URANUS!'