Souper Sleuth Pillows

A man is eating soup in a restaurant and there's a zipper in his food - 'Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!'

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

Paranormal A-Z...

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

He looks so natural lying there...

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"I hate it when they put kittens in the impulse buying section."

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

Low Hanging Fruit

"Ok, you were right – dogs can see ghosts."

The Modern Godot

'Another sad case of an over dose on uncut sugar cereal.'

'Waiter, there's a drone in my soup.'

Alphabet soup

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

"Do you see the one who possessed your soul?"

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

Lost Property - Missing Head

"Why is this cart so heavy?"

"Your chocolate biscuits and cakes are getting smaller - and where's your sweets aisle?"

"All these vitamins and nutrients, plus it makes it own sauce! We should be eating this!"

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

"We know you boosted that milk truck!" "Admit it or we'll take a bite outta you!"

'Look! It's Trendy Vineyards' Merlot Window Cleaner! Streak-free cleaning, because it's 50 proof!'

Scientists discover a new Superbug

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