Soundwave Scientist T-Shirts

Musician having a brain scan.

Future garbage truck driver.

"This next song is just a song. Try not to read anything into it."

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

"I'd know my tinnitus anywhere and this isn't it."

Music Freak.

"And here's one I made up called 'Mama's Last Nerve.'"

Rock & Roll

Sounds of the market hitting all time highs. . .

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

Cow Sonar

Justice for a heckler.

"I love hearing that lonesome wail of the train whistle as the magnitude of the frequency of the wave changes due to the doppler effect."

The Edward Witten String-Theory Quarter

Specialized regions in a couple of human chromosomes.

"Our researchers have discovered that 'E' is the most common, and only, letter in the dolphin alphabet."

Rational explanations

'Don't worry, the first 30 years working as a sound engineer are the hardest.'

Didgeridoos

Compact Disc: "01011100110001011011010001111...."

"I think I'm going to fall! Will one of you please make a note of the sound in case anyone every asks?"

The reception here is awful!

'Well, Tom, everyone suffers from delusions from time to time.'

'I'm running into lots of trouble with my ambition to be a shock jock.'

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

"It was just humming right along - then began whistling."

Little Jimmy Harmon: first to amplify the sparerib

C. Doppler takes a walk.

'The sooner you are 'discovered' the better - you're costing your Dad a fortune in electricity!'

"Great! You're hired."

A Meeting of Audio Buffs.