Soundtrack Specialist T-Shirts

"You're dragging the beat."

"Well, I'm sorry, but I just can't help mindlessly humming the corn ball tunes I pick up from the elevator."

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

Felix Mendelssohn

'Why don't you ever look at ME that way?'

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

'What luck! A sound technician.'

Movies vs. Films

Subwoofer

Musical genres

"The sound system is fixed so we can start. Would you kindly put the beach ball away!"

'Theaters from Hell.' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

'I told you we should have gone wireless.'

'The bloke with violin is on holiday.'

An Audio Technician's Pocket Knife

"Trust me, Brad, those comedy sound effects aren't a reflection of how this is going."

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

'Damn ! I don't have a clue where we are.'

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

'If you see the congregation start to fall asleep, could you give me a little microphone feedback?'

'Six disc CD changer, six hundred watt multi-amp, 800 watt sub, I tell you man this monster rocks!!'

'Access to the kids? No. I want access to the audio equipment.'

'This beauty will give you that British sound. It will convert your nasal twang into proper Queen's English.

'I understand Sir. No, I didn't take that personally, Sir...Could you hold please?'

"... And how long have you had this total fixation with T.V.?"

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

'Here is your new stereo. It's got a SupaDeep Woofer System, with it's high octane surround sound, I'm sure it will fit smoothly into your life. But for God's sake; don't turn it on.'

Resume of Claude Brisketson Composer

'Congratulations, its a six pound audio technician.'

Daredevil. No. But it's been months now. I wanna talk about it. Well, I haven't watched the last couple episodes yet. Blasphemy! You have one job as a modern American consumer of Netflixian entertainment: and that's to binge-watch every episode the day the series is released. Sorry, little buddy. Some of us have lives. What's that supposed to mean?! Careful what you say around seniors. You'd never be man enough to handle a good Price is Right marathon! You distract it while I make my escape.

Felix Mendelssohn

'I know the legal process doesn't really work like it does on TV, but couldn't you at least have a sound track.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

Gioacchino Antonio Rossini

'Whom should I call first? 911 or the audio technician?'