Sophisticated Tastes Enthusiast Pillows

Pig asking whether the farmers truffles are 'Rum or Champagne?'

Wine Lady

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

Civilized Salmon

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"My secret is having a ton of money to buy the best ingredients."

Haute Chinese

"Next time make up your mind and just pick one!"

"I'm unable to process this image."

Join me for dinner?

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

'Good thing you ordered a double portion.'

"Sorry about the delay, sir. The manager is interviewing chefs at this very moment."

'Pass the grey stuff.'

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

Cut out and keep your own Chef

"You see, I don't believe in eating fast. I believe in savoring. I....hey, stop looking at my food!"

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"Whatever is quickest - I'm starving!"

"Pinot Noir, God's apology for White Zinfandel."

"They say the taste makes up for their lack in artful presentation."

Ice Cream Flavors

A restaurant with a "Main Dining Room" and a "Room for Dessert".

"Chef, we've run out of terracotta roof tiles!"