Soft Serve Aficionado T-Shirts

"That bully gave me a swirly."

Soup of the month.

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

You're the botanicals in my gin

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

Mary Margaret, the best bar Nun.

"We're out of today's soup, but you can have tomorrow's soup from yesterday which is the same as today's."

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

Roller Coasters

"Could you spare a few minutes to give some feedback on your death experience?"

'Somehow it just doesn't seem worth it for a one man business.'

Alphabet Soup: Now in a bold new font.

'Perhaps monsieur found the Vichyssoise 'crunchy' because the soup bowl was not edible.'

Man swipes friend's drink, saying: 'Thanks Dave, I'll have what you're having.'

Remember, what happens in Roswell, stays in Roswell.

"It's just the usual Wednesday crowd."

'Can't you read?!'

"I haven't been fond of humans since one of them coined the phrase, 'in the soup'."

"Edward, if you don't mind, this is very serious."

"Who needs therapists?!"

"I think the soup may be just a bit too salty."

'Could you show me something that's more feature laden?'

"I don't care if it's forty years old and has a good body! I'm trying to get pissed, not date it!"

Give a fly a bowl of soup and he'll eat for a day. Teach him how to use a crock-pot and he'll eat for a lifetime.

"There's a two drink limit if you're going to use the monkey bars."

'I'd like a brandy please...'

"Excuse me, waiter? There's a hair in my soup."

"Round of golf or a round of drinks?"

"One skinny latte, and is that with almond milk, coconut milk, soya milk..."