Socratic Drinker T-Shirts

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

Wine Lady

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

Happy Hour

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

Just the one...

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

Next Round Indicator

'Malty tasking.'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

"If there's been a constant theme in my life It's that I'm really thirsty."

'Ted, isn't it about time you sorted out your deer-gut?'

"You want your olive?"

"Your shout!"

"Darling! We've become armchair socialites."

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

Join me in a beer?

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."

"Ignore gordon. He's had a snootfull."

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'