Social Media Detox Fan Gifts

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”

"You realize there’s probably an app for all this?!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Screen Time vs Book Time

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

"Don't open me, you fool!"

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

America Off-line.

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

'My best method for relieving stress is to misplace my cellphone.'

"There's no phones, social media, selfies, reality TV, online trolls, political-correctness or fake news."

'Let's have a quiet romantic evening together...we'll turn our cell phones off.'

"I'm sorry, Brad, but I'm saving eye-contact for that special someone."

Children's games and technology

"Sale. Save 100% of your energy by closing this website. Close now. No, thanks."

"Things that make me feel better/Things I'm too tired to do......Things that make me feel worse/Things I do when I'm tired.

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

Puppy and Elephant Selfie

"I wish you'd stop obsessively checking your feed!"

"I don't care how many likes you got for it on Facebook it's still a D minus!"

"I hate hibernating! All our devices need updating. And now we need to go through a thousand phone and text messages."

"For your enjoyment: Please turn off electronic devices, close your eyes, and cover your ears."

"Well, buddy....a lot of people are missing that. Just look at the social media comments."

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

"Isn't this so much better without our devices?"