Social Media Analysts T-Shirts

"I'll have an extra large conspiracy burger with anti-semitism, plenty of racism, stupidity and a load of crap."

Hate Platforms

In the Guru District

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'If only every year was an election year.'

Press Freedom

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

Studies show foods work miracles!

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Will follow you on social media for food."

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"Which news channel should we watch?"

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

'My plan for the mid east has approval of both Houses of Congress, Oprah, Larry King, Lettermen and Leno.'

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

'Apologists today said little white lies -- but not the big lie -- may have played a part in Iraq Policies....'

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

Fifty shades of Leveson.

Newspaper suicide.

"I'll never forget you."