Soap Suds Savant T-Shirts

Holiday Gifts 2020

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

"Shootout at the Soapy Canal"

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

"Ultimately, we realized we share too many app subscriptions not to make it work."

Statue of Liberty and Hand Sanitizer

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

The Tragedy of Prosperity

"Ah — excellent catsup."

'Not whale stew again.'

"House red, sir?"

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

Sandwich snob.

"Getting a Brazilian has been nothing like I expected."

'I'm sorry, I can't reveal my sauce.'

Make Your Own Alphabet Soup Starter Kit

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

'Silly Billy - who told you that you could eat a cake of soap?'

"Chef keeps the secrets of his sauces close to his chest"

"And I recommend to not get sauced."

'I think it needs more punctuation.'

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

"Teeth cleaned. No questions asked."

'Blast it's raining!'

'Try new 'Letter-Rip!' It's alphabet soup AND a laxative! Guaranteed to give you a vowel movement!'

"Guilty! The broth was awful!"

'Today was a bit of a disaster.' - 'First I cut my finger and bled everywhere, then I lost my plaster while I was cooking.' - 'Do you want the last bowl of pumpkin soup?' - 'No, it's okay. You go for it.'

"The groomer used too much product."

'I figured this would make great soup - I got it from a hunter this morning!'

'I thought I'd try making marmalade. Do we have any marmals?'

"This means that my dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich!"