Snowy Shenanigans Gifts

"And you say you've been erect for over 4 hours?"

The Frankenstein snowman.

'She'll never look for me here.'

'Fine. And you?'

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

"Is that snow? We never get snow around here...what do we do?"

"Frankly, I'm surprised that at your age you would even consider putting your tongue on a frozen metal pole!"

'It's Johnny Taylor's snowsuit, but I don't think he's in there.'

'ok, who threw that?'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

'It's crazy what a peep will eat.'

Dolphin at bar - 'I'm in disguise'

'We've got it narrowed down to between three and twenty-three pounds.'

'Eldon decided to make some new friends.'

'Grab the wand! Grab the wand!'

Santa pees his name in rooftop snow.

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

'Are you crazy? -- up here, water balloons are lethal!'

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

Experts only.

'Hot! Hot!'

Football ground toilets include one for mascots.

'We are unable to complete your call as dialed. Please remove your mittens and dial your call again.'

'I demand a second opinion!'

'No Billy! I am not ready to see you yet!'

A man having difficulty standing up on the icey path

"For some reason, people drink a lot less since I brought my twin brother into the business."

'I warned you not to keep on calling him 'Fatty Christmas'!'