Smoking Jacket Aficionado Gifts

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

'I know one of my shoulders is lower than the other. It's because my father's guiding hand is always on that shoulder.'

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'I'm an atheist!'

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

Merry Christmas.

'I started as an office boy and growled my way to the top.'

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.

"I can really taste my food since giving up smoking, so I've started again."

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

"Gosh! Look what he's done to his Harry Potter books..."

"The other reindeer sent me back to the smoking section."

'A lab had me smoking cigarettes for months. I'm living off my disability payments. You?'

"I could easily change to a healthier lifestyle, but then I'd live longer and be a burden on my loved ones in my old age."

"What?!"

Remote control car breakdown.

José Saramago

Portrait of Shakespeare smoking.

"So it's agreed then. From now on we're to do our hourse trading in partially smoke-filled rooms."

Vaping cigarette

The Farmer's Return.

'No I haven't got a light, shove off!'

Mashed potatoes...

Pipe Down

'These new ideas are silly, Father, the boiled tobacco tasted awful and you've spent an age trying to light that potato.'

"Mr Hudson, could you kindly refrain from smoking in the brain scan machine."

Albert Camus

Nature is not perfect

'I don't mind him smoking in bed. . .But not herrings.'

'We don't get many takers for the smoking section anymore.'

'My doctor's fit note suggested a phased return to work. I'll see you for another smoking break tomorrow.'

Lab Rat Rehab...