Smoke Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I need a plane I can fly high enough each day to smoke my cigars without offending anyone.'

Havana Cigars Limited

'It's not you, it's your carbon footprint.'

'Not for me thanks, mate - I'm only a passive smoker.'

"Well, it's a good thing you changed cigarettes, Frank. You only have cancer light."

'Thanks for the call madam...but that's actually their designated smoking room.'

After a rare sighting, a string of phrases is born,

"Bob sacrifices the first burger to the barbecue gods."

"Of all the places I didn't expect a smoking ban,"

'...And what else did you bring back from the New World, Columbus?'

Vaping cigarette

'... but the good news is, you don't need to stop smoking and drinking!'

"Mr Hudson, could you kindly refrain from smoking in the brain scan machine."

'I do like a post-coital smoke.'

Moses takes a rest.

'Do you mind if I smoke?'

'I know it's witness protection but do we have to drink and smoke so much and play poker all day and night.'

'Ugh! What's all this nonsense about passive smoking?' (Wife collapsed in background)

Carbon Trading.

'You've got a buildup of creosote. It's no wonder: You smoked like a chimney.'

'My client is willing to plead guilty if he would be sentenced to a facility that allows smoking.'

Deserted island with a 'No Smoking' sign on it

I smoked for thirty years but I've given it up....

'No, I can never reach to light my own either!'

'I had a great holiday, what do you think of the suntan?'

'I see bill came out second best in his hassle with Helen over smoking in the house.'

'I don't mind him smoking in bed. . .But not herrings.'

'Mind if I smoke here, too?'

Flamo the Fire Eater offering light to female bar patron

Vape

"Keep a lookout."

"Jerry! - Your head's on fire!!"

"The car is smoking again."

"Do you have a non-smoking section..?"

Me, if I'm on kids duty and they become a bit rowdy, I just smoke them and they then quiet down pretty quickly...