Smoke Detector Tester Gifts

"Larry's made new friends learning to cook. He knows everyone at the Recipe Emergency Hotline."

"We're in for a real treat tonight. Freddy's preparing his blackened swordfish."

No Smoking.

'That's part of the reason for our problem. We lost the key to the door.'

"When Stan's barbecuing nothings ever 'well done'."

Musical Pipe

"We've come here to smoke."

'What we have to do is utilize some pollution control equipment in our manufacturing of pollution control equipment.'

'...And maybe they know something about passive smoking you don't.'

'Those aren't smoke rings... they're Hawaiian Leis.'

Fire at the Bisto Factory

Canadian wildfires

Warning.

'Hey you! You work here, don't you? You people could be in real trouble with the fire marshal for not having any smoke detectors! I assume they make regular inspections around here?'

Well, I don't care if the cuffs are hurting your wrists, sailor boy! I want to know what this green leafy substance is right now!... And maybe we should check that pipe of yours too, huh?

New Year's Resolution - stop smoking.

The cost of smoking

"That's affirmative. It smells delicious. Over."

"I can hear the smoke alarm.Is dinner ready?"

'Either my wide is making supper of Custer's coming.'

"Those stories, plus Andy Rooney."

'It's either a crank call or some idiot's set his loin cloth on fire.'

New parents refusing to change their baby's nappy

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

'I prefer these imported cigarettes - they don't have a health warning.'

"Dinner isn't ready yet. I haven't heard the smoke alarm go off."

"Yeah yeah, 'monkey see, monkey do', but your mum is right: do as I say, not as I do!"

'Looks like Mom is making the chicken extra-crispy again.'

'Harlow, perhaps you should go back to SMOKING!'

'Another bullseye! What do you think of black poweder guns now, Ben?'

Passenger on a train blaming a clerical man for smoking

Cigarette Ash has made evil face.

'As a matter of fact, he quit smoking three years ago.'

'No, I can never reach to light my own either!'

"Gee, I'd be lost without your constant peer pressure."