Smartwatch Sleuth Pillows

"We worked out how to make the watch smaller, now we just need to figure out how to make it lighter!"

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"I don't think those are authentic, either, bud."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"You know, no matter how much you stare at your watch, summer isn't going to come any faster."

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

"How do you know my watch isn't shockproof?"

The Modern Godot

"They were all out of rings, so I got you a watch."

'It's something to do with a Microsoft copyright infringement.'

"...Software upgrade provides a seamless transition from simple functionality to multi-platform confusion, chaos and frustration..."

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

'Last week I got a lovely watch for my wife!'

Do' you have the time?'

"What an awful morning. I left home without my phone."

'Well the GOOD news is that the new software analyzed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product...'

Visiting 'friends'.

'Tech support says your anti-virus software did not catch the problem since it is not a virus. It's a bacterium.'

"Less overcoat, lower prices."

Dickens' Counterfeit Rolex.

'Remember, all these security cameras are for YOUR protection...otherwise, I'd come over there and smack you.'

'Your acceptance is tentative until we can rule on the question of your knowingly using pirated software.'

'This watch goes up to fifty-nine seconds a minute!'

F.B.I. An equal opportunity phone tapper without regard to race, sex, or national origin.

He crash tests software.

"Well sorry doc, but that's not the reading I get from my digital wrist heart monitor."

You're being watched.

'I've had enough of these everlasting arguments - I say you're late!'

Mental Breakdown

Six Degrees of Depradation

"These are just the directions to the remote. The directions to the TV are much longer. Technology!"

'I've ruined so many watches: Only buy waterproff watches, not water-resistant watches,,,'

News of the Underworld