Smart Home Starter Gifts

"Let's take it step by step. How do I turn it on?"

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"I think you put too much healthy food in our smart refrigerator. It's about to spit it all out."

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

"You are still here."

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"For the last time...I'm Alexa, not Siri! Get it right, moron!"

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

'Good grief! Our house is so 'smart' it just refinanced itself!'

"Hey Google, describe the view."

"I'm a home-tech specialist. Your daughter called us. I'm here to convert her doll house into a smart doll house."

'Say - according to our home computer, we're out of bread.'

"My assets consist of a piggy bank, 2 teeth for the tooth fairy, and whatever change I find in the living room sofa."

"I hate this smart refrigerator."

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

"The last vampire who lived in it spared no expense on upgrades. Especially when it comes to the latest technology."

"It's a smart toaster. If you can't figure it out, press the 'Dumb It Down' button."

"It's a robo vacuum cleaner."

"I'm all for the internet of things - but I hate pop-up ads."

"How do you like our new smart water hose? It knows when you're dirty and hoses you off before you come into the house."

"Hang on - I've got an app for this. . ."

"I'd text you, but I haven't learnt to spell yet."

"I just got an alert from our smart refrigerator. It's pleading with us to not stick anything else on it."

"Shouldn't have bought a touch-screen TV."

"How do I turn Alexa off?"

"It's a smart toilet...after my husband uses it, the seat puts itself down!"