"Please, do go on about modern financial theory—but with someone else."
Small Talk Escape Artist Gifts
Looking for a gift for the small talk escape artist who loves witty sarcasm and clever humor? Our collection features fun, professionally designed items that celebrate their creative way of avoiding small talk. Whether it's for a friend, coworker, or yourself, find the perfect playful gift that speaks their language and adds a bit of humor to everyday moments.
'What's your favourite operating system?' - 'I don't have one.' - 'Well, you killed that conversation.' - 'It deserved to die.'
'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'
"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."
"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."
"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."
'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'
"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."
"This is our most difficult escape room. In here, you're a mother of 4 unruly children, tons of overdue bills and a lazy husband."
"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."
"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"
"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"
Nesting dolls stranded on an island send out nesting bottles with messages in each of them.
"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."
'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'
"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."
"Sorry, I'm preaching again. Why don't we pause for a moment while I pass around the collection plate."
'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'
"It's safe to close your eyes and relax...these meetings are safety equipped with front and side airbags."
Undignified Exits of the Planet World: Geronimo!
"Sorry I'm late. Traffic was fine. I just don't like any of you and don't want to be here."
Tweaking the CV.
Crib Escape
Chairmen of the Bored
"That's you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP!"
'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'
Ostrich's head buried into a pile of sand containing a woman
Desert Island Fantasies
'These virtual-reality goggles are great! Right now, I'm sun-bathing in Tahiti...'
Office worker chips a golf ball into in tray on a desk at work.
"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."
An office worker daydreams about a new poster.
Wishing Well
'As usual, I'm right on time. My internal alarm clock always wakes me just as theses meetings are over.'
"My entire family's coming for the holidays."
Small Talk Escape Artist Gifts Collection
Small Talk Escape Artist Mugs
Explore our collection of mugs designed for the small talk escape artist—perfect for those who love clever, humorous drinkware with a creative flair.
Small Talk Escape Artist Pillows
Find playful pillows that showcase the small talk escape artist’s flair for humor—an easy way to add personality to any room.
Small Talk Escape Artist Prints
Decorate with prints that capture the essence of the small talk escape artist—fun, creative, and conversation-starting wall art.
Small Talk Escape Artist T-Shirts
Discover our witty t-shirts for the small talk escape artist—garments that let everyone know they’re a master at avoiding boring conversations.