Smack Talk Specialist Gifts

Less than Ultimate Fighting.

Copycats

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

"I can't come in today, I'm feeling like myself."

7 More Dwarfs

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

'Coleridge'

"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."

"Yo, how's it swinging?"

"You do realise that this position is only for the assistant bootlicker to the CEO?"

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

'It's funny because it's true.'

"I enjoy being old - my health always gives me something to talk about!"

Communication

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 3

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

It's academic

"How do you respond to critics who claim you're just trying to scare people?"

'How humiliating! I got shot down by my own talking points!'

Snail slow to react to an ant's joke.

'With me and Dave it was definitely love at first sight. How about you two?'

"Be patient with Ed. You can skip his political harangue in 15 seconds and move right onto sports."

"Lovely weather for it."

'Have we met someplace? Yes, that's why I quit going there.'

'HEY,no Tongue!'

Department of Disinformation Looms Over the Department of Information.

Now that we've invented language and bipedalism, we can do stand-up comedy!

He took every chance to practice his talk.

"Actually, I don't consider myself to be a have or a have-not. I'm more of a have-to-have."

"A cartoon about Brexit, Syria, refugees, Yemen, France... Anything but Trump!"

"We'll get him to talk."

Skateboard English

Small Talk Therapy