Slot Machine Aficionado Pillows

Gambler wins lemons on fruit machne

Man playing a fruit machine wins three cherries

'As CFO of our company, your presence at the casino four afternoons a week is not conducive to a sound corporate image.'

Monkey casino study.

One Armed Bandit

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

Dog in casino.

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

Slug roulette

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'

"What'll ya have?"

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

'It's a penny slot--give me a hundred.'

Election slot machine. No matter the outcome, I always lose money.

'I need to find a loose machine like that.'

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

Destination casinos...

'My wife encourages this. She thinks I'm playing the Russian version.'

Tonto Casino.

Brewery Lorry has Saloon Doors.

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'

Visit Las Vegas! The city that never sleeps' ot even takes a nap!: 'Because of competition, they had to raise the ante!'

"There's a tell."

'Our ceiling is under repair--sorry.'

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

'This is the third one today. Why can't the gynecologists have their convention someplace other than Vegas?'

"I think I need a professional money manager. I invest sixty five percent of my money gambling in casinos and thirty five percent I keep under the mattress."

'The only thing better than being comped an '83 Amarone, is having a girlfriend who isn't a wine drinker.'

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'