Slide Swiper T-Shirts

The waterslides are fun, but the water seesaw, not so much.

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

Repurposing the aqueducts of Ancient Rome.

"Textin’"

Menu Dating

Turtle Hat

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."

'You must all promise never to divulge what you are about to see.'

How would Madam like to pay?

Free Little Library

'That guy is SO tacky.'

"Hey—no cheating!"

'Does your phone have a scanner thingy? I've got a barcode on my butt if you want my number.'

Woman replaces her husband with her smartphone.

Snowman outside library.

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

"I don't care what your chat group says. I say you're becoming overly dependent on technological gadgetry."

In a shrewd business move, Hell enters the family amusement park industry.

"He was that needy, he actually asked me on a second date."

Check out my new e-reader. This thing is sleek, and fast. Aha! What? How can you say you don't like books> This is just a digital book device. So you like reading after all? Reading? What do you use it for? Downloading books I buy on impulse, looking at the first few pages, moving on. So, so, so sad and true.

Bunny Slope

Big smart phone and small tablet.

Mobiles and Procrastination

"I'm in the mood to swipe left on everything."

"You can't put that phone down, can you?"

We're looking for a few greedy people.

A woman glides down a water slide

Tommy, I have a question for you. I didn't do nothin'. We're missing a scone. Now, no one's accusing you of anything. I swear, you've got the wrong guy. I definitely didn't take a scone when you went to check email because I was super hungry. You have the right to remain silent. I did it!

"Do you recall how my eHarmony profile said I love to hike? Well, I lied."

'Sorry. In the time it took you to get out your credit card the price of smokes went up another 30 cents.'

Look up from your phone!

Glenda, for the 100th time you can not buy the red dress! Put away your bank card now!

"You don't look like your picture."