Sleeper Extraordinaire T-Shirts

'How can I possibly be a discipline problem? I'm usually asleep.'

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

'Oh, you nasty sluggard!'

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'I've been told I grind my teeth while I'm napping at work.'

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

Sleeping masks

For goodness sake, can't you see I'm on a night shift!

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

'Post-Hibernation Blues'

"Tonight the covers stay on my side."

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

An Excellent Excuse.

"For a great day's sleep you can't beat out new line of memory foam coffins."

The Home Birth of Venus

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

Roughing it in the Great Outdoors.

"No more getting up and having to go to the kitchen for a midnight snack."

Cat Dreams

'I can't sleep a wink - it feels like someone's got their life savings under here.'

"I bought this mattress for you so you can sleep in the office when you're working overtime...hey! I was expecting you to be a bit more grateful, mister!"

"Wake up, blanket hog! You're having that burrito dream again!"

"I can't believe it...summer's almost over...time has slipped through my hands...life has passed me by."

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."

The Princess and the Pea

'Hey, nice hammock, Gary.'