Sleep Coach T-Shirts

"Worst sleeping lesson ever."

"I think I need an extra pillow."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

'I hate counting sheep. I get enough math at school.'

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

"What's with your hair?"

"You were snoring."

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

'It's a soothing sounds machine. Spring Rain, Summer Breeze, and Fall School Bus.'

The next step in executive efficiency - Microsoft PowerNap.

'If you can't sleep...imagine you're at work.'

"Hush, little baby, don’t you cry ... ever."

Fish sleeps while counting worms that jump over a fence.

Center For Sleep Deprivation

"No doctor, my husband is not sleep-walking again. He is sleep-jumping!"

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

"I don't care if we did hibernate all Winter, I'm still tired."

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

A man's brain is in a glass on his bed stand next to his dentures.