Skincare Skeptics Prints

'Spread it on, lick it off.'

When prunes lose the plot: they advertise anti wrinkle cream.

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

"Did you check the SPF, dear?"

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

Desert Dermatologist

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

'I assure you madam, that the uglification factor of this mirror is no greater than the nationally accepted one-to-one standard.'

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

'Now that you've all had a chance to try the shampoo we would like you to fill in this questionnaire.'

The US election is over.

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

"To be honest, it's the same stuff just in different bottles!"

"How come your skin is sooooo smooth?"

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

'Believe me, sweetie, if I thought the 'Wrinkle Out' setting on the clothes dryer would work...'

'No, it's not a special on the Grand Canyon. It's an actor's face in high definition.'

"Which one of these things is the soap?"

'Mildred....is that you?'

'He steals from the drug companies and gives to the elderly!'

'My doctor told me these new Botox injections could be harmful.'

Mooseturizer: Tired of those annoying Dry and Chafed antlers?

Tanning salons to avoid. . .

'These facial wraps work great on dead skin.'

Beauty Products - for women, and for men (exactly the same, but with turbo added).

'I'm sure I'm getting worry lines worring if this anti wrinkle cream is working!'

'You created a new skin disease from scratch.'

Anita Roddick

'That new concealer works great!'