Skill Development Gifts

"Apart from helping the community, making new friends, enjoying your experiences, supporting people in need, developing new skills, building a better community and having fun I can't see the point in volunteering!"

STRIP *Community Care * Skilled volunteer

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

Time to try something new.

'You're never going to follow me in my trade, Son - you may as well go to university.'

We learn by doing

"You need to put in 10,000 hours."

"It's good practice between battles."

People enter and leave a training school.

The Training Intensified

"Cross-training Larry, cross-training. Don't you read your emails?"

"Closing all the district offices isn't completely negative...I mean it might encourage some of our clients to develop important coping skills."

Read Any Good Lips Lately?

"After all of this, even I could work in technology."

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"Staff support"

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Reach for the Star.

International Women's Day.

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

Pipe Dream.