Sizzle Superstar Pillows

Cooking

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

Jumping cheerleaders

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

Everything You Wanted to Know About Stats ...

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

"I don't bake, I don't cook, but I make one kick-ass vinaigrette."

"I think I'm in the wrong kind of spin class!"

Cupcakes!

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

Staycation Photos

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

"It's not really perjury if you're a compulsive liar."

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

"Howard, you've met my ukulele ladies before."

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

'Nobody likes me at school. I need a personal assistant, a trainer and a P.R. firm!'

"What's the fun of smelling the Bougainvillea in paradise if I don't smell the envy on Facebook?"

Need money for lessons

'No case law, but we did get 50,000 hits on Youtube.'

Sit ups.

'Amazing! 140 decibels as he hits the surface! That puts him easily into first!'

"This seems like a good place to break, play a basketball game, them come back for the next session."

'I think our fans are excited for us. It just doesn't seem like it because of doing 'The Wave' they do 'The Still Water'.'

'Listen Jimmy, as a member of the School Swimming Squad, you're not taking your training seriously enough!'

Suntan Lotion - Three Exciting Fragrances: Barbecue, Smokey Bacon and Sunday Roasts.

An Olympian's Moment

Child chatting on cell phone at top of slide.

'That's still blurry This might be a good time to show you your bill.'