Size Seeker Pillows

'You don't have anything in a smaller size do you?'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Pampered and poodled.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

Critisize your weight.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

"I don't like your application."

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"Do you do much walking?"

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

Elegant woman in backless dress.

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'I'll take it!'

Changing Room Decisions

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

Tuck Shop