Silver Speedsters Pillows

"To save me from losing it on the bends, I swear by a smearing of denture fixative."

Radar Gun Readings at Baseball Stadium

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"I don't know who you are!"

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Hey, wait for me!'

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

Birthday Racing Car

Man running

Car leaving highway crashes through 'EXIT HERE' sign.

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

"IBS isn't all bad. It was largely responsible for me winning 6 sprinting medals in college track."

"Take these. They'll help bring you up to speed."

"Emergency exits are located on both sides of the cabin...."

'So, then.... you don't LIKE life in the fast lane?'

A souped up car...

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."

Pensioners run riot on mobility scooters.

"While you're at it, can you do something with him? He can't remember a thing!"

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Driver at Grand Prix shooting another driver with the cork from champagne

Rolling Stop.

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

Arcarde Patrol

"I did it Dad! I ran all the way home and beat the rain!"

caring for the elderly in Cuba

Congratulations for male runner

I can be upgraded, can you?

Wife doing Internet banking & Online shopping, saying 'Darling, I'm just collecting my pension. Is there anything we need from the shops?'