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COWMIKAZES

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"They're so adorable at that age!"

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"Winter is coming, and there will be months without much sunshine, so it's important that you take your vitamin D supplement Darling..."

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

Sleepwalker on treadmill

Emergency Phone.

'Jurassic Pork.'

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

The Goalkeeper

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

"See? Look what happened to Ook! - I WARNED you about evolution."

Shaved Ice

'Snap out of it.'

Improve your leaping ability or your money back.

Dinosaurs ponder fad dieting prior to extinction.

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"I pose as a concerned citizen, but honestly I wouldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct."

"With one wrong turn, Sparky's big adventure became a nightmare."

"What you have is what we call Cactunitus. It's when your skin is so dry you start to morph into a cactus."

"Would you thrive in a hostile work environment?"

Homing Pigeon GPS Manfunction

Chippunks

"We keep revisiting this leash thing... Why is it so difficult for him?"

"Then again, maybe the fourth green is that way."