Silent Humor Enthusiast Pillows

'You have the right to remain silent...'

"Since I hate small talk and I hate big talk, I guess I won't be talking."

"I see you like to let your actions do the talking."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

Trappist Monk Discord

'What does it say, Dad?'

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

HELLth Food Sprouts

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

"Actually, you do have a racist bone in your body."

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

Clone Factory

"The good news is it's brightening up..."

"Oh, just the usual here, occupying Wall Street."

Man on left - 'What do you call a public servant who spends half their time doing private work?' Man on right - 'An MP?'

"Inactivists"

Pokemon Get Lost

Trump Tariffs

'In my opinion, hold out for a doctor.'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

"As I understand, we stop refugees making dangerous journeys to a safe countey and offer them safe passage to a dangerous one..."

Trappist talk show.

'Look, half the work is done! All you need to do is fill in the top part so we can legally say the bottom part.'

'We're really just a mom and pop store...if mom and pop had 600,000 employees.'

Vocabulary Glossary for Libya

Obama speaks about Iran's nuclear arms.

"Honey, come quick! I think I just bought Greece on Ebay!"

Prescription Drugs '96.

Small Government Is Here

Tea Party and the US economy