Sideshow Star Gifts

Clown Shaving

"Could I ask just one question?"

"It's not fair! I only got 100 on my English test!"

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

Cheerleaders

"That's lovely darling, but I don't think that's what your teacher meant when she asked you to draw your family tree..."

"Jeez, these things are hot."

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

"And afterwards, I'll be signing my new DVD of this presentation in the lobby."

"Great! I've finally mastered all my competencies and my teachers still have most of their hair."

STRIP Hambone: Computer addict

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

Staycation Photos

You can tell which seniors got accepted early admission! West Fester High School.

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

Rob Brydon.

"Your school report is brilliant! It's going straight into the fireproof box for safe keeping..."

"Two minutes, 40 seconds. Next ... Two minutes, 53 seconds. Next ..."

'It's hard to believe that at home, she's a mommy.'

Patron Saint of Clowns...St. Pie-us

"When I can't sleep I count Powerpoint slides."

'It's for show and tell!'

Stick with me, Mr. Fusco

'My classmates voted me most likely to succeed!'

The Lobster Man - The Sand-Eating Child - The Alligator Lady - The Living Head

'Hello, Mrs. Horton? Could you please stop by school this afternoon?'

"Thank you for coming into the studio tonight, your story is truly a fascinating one, however I've decided our time would be better spent reviewing my meteoric rise to celebrity status within this television network."

"You always seem to get good grades in Show and Tell."

Touch Gig

"Which brings us to my next point."

Sit ups.

'You are good with kids, but you need a teaching credential to teach.'

Barnum & Bailey's 3 - ring progeny

Child chatting on cell phone at top of slide.

"Admit it, you didn't prepare your slide presentation, did you?"