Siblings Of New Parents Pillows

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

Child driving a toy car

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

Children's Dreams on Christmas Eve

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

'Oh, nothing, just babysitting the Lord of the Rings.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

Groovy Baby

Maternity ward: 'Oh boy - stereo!'

Windmill

"Once I have the motor skills, I'll be knee deep in pudding every. Damn. Day."

"Technology is for babies!"

"Mom, when the baby's born, can I have the bubble wrap it's shipped in?"

"Would you like to cut the cord?"

"Mom, when do I get my own room?"

Newborns on cell phones

'A boy? Come on, Mom, you can do better than that!'

Boy slides down handrail.

'Oh look Julia, he's just text me his first word.'

"I didn't hear the full story, but you came from either the stork or ebay."

'I never know how much to leave for lunch.'

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

Freak Family.

"Any possibility of a puppy?"

"Which one is yours?"

"So, the inevitable sequel."

Baby restaurant

Argument between Disposable or Washable Nappies

"Your priorities change once you get a new toy."

"Forward and backward, not up and down!"

'They sort of grow on you.'