Siblings Advice Guru Gifts

'Take it from someone with experience. . . you can't go throwing tantrums until you've at least tossed a few.'

Mac OS 20

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

A. Lincoln, President. The "of the people, by the people, for the people" part is great, Abe, but the "people who need people" section may be overkill.

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk - it's hard to believe we're related.'

'Is that IT? All this way for just the ONE?'

"Act your birth order!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

To his dismay, Captain Kirk stumbles upon a Vulcan handsign-to-English translation website,

'My brother got all the glory. For me it was Randolph with your nose so pink, you really make my sleigh team stink.'

What will be the worst part about your first semester of college being online classes only? My little brother will be my freshman year roommate!

'Cleanliness is next to...impossible.'

"No, William. This is your new little brother, Christopher. Not William 2.0."

"Second grade is tough, little brother. It's the year teachers no longer believe your dog ate your homework."

'And then Mindy had the nerve to call me a 'helicopter mom.' Me? In this wonderful jetpack! As if!'

'Mom says she has a souffle in the oven - Does that mean I'm going to have a baby brother?'

'MOM! -- Samantha called me names in her diary!'

"No arms deliveries!" "Arms deliveries!" "No arms deliveries!" "Arms deliveries!"

"Don't worry, and don't listen to your brother! You can't really smell fear: it's just an expression..."

Brother and sister at the dentist

'How do you figure?'

"Note cards, like a TV talk-show host! Now I can talk intelligently on any subject!"

'My brother ate my homework.'

'I told my Mom either the sitter goes, or I go!'

"It's not gas...it's sibling rivalry."

"No, I'm not here for your little sister."

When I'm a famous actress, you'll be jealous. Wrong. I can't wait to see you in the movies. It's nice that you can enjoy my glamorous success. Or�Enjoy watching you get punched out like the girls in all the action flicks. Great. Hollywood takes over where little brother leave off.

"Your essay on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your sister's"

"If I were your big sister, I'd show you how to act right!"

"There's really a baby in there? Whatcha do...eat him?"

"Just be aware, once you go upright there's no going back."

'That's birth certificate fraud!'

George Orwell - the early years...