Showbiz Seasoning T-Shirts

"You missed the garlic. The place went nuts when he added the garlic."

"I come here for the pepper."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

Just a little seasoning...

Toenail clipping missile.

Remember . . . If at first you do succeed, make sequels!'

"No offense, but the manna needs salt."

"Sorry, you're not cut out to be a mime artist."

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

Boarway Show

'I don't mind playing dead. But what I would really like to do is direct.'

"Granted, there's no business like show business, but that's not the business I know."

"When the boss says jump, I say how high."

Magic Accident

'So let this be a lesson to you Courtney, 'there's no people like showpeople!''

"For his next picture, my client wants creative control, script approval, and a percentage of the gross. Is that clear?"

Last Will and Testament: Salt, Pepper, Tarragon, Garlic.

There's been a misundertanding-we're advertising for GAGSTERS!'

A woman bows to the crowd

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."

"Yes, Your Honor, I'm Mr. Brandon, Mr. Shindelbower's attorney, along with his agent and publicist."

'We've got 'Jumpin' Jake' Stevens on drums, 'Slick' Chuck on bass and 'Wasted Pete' Walthons on the trumpet.'

Garlic, the wonderful stinking rose.

'I'm just not keen.'

'Can you do anything else?'

"Wait a minute... You're not Warren Gurkenman the famous actor, but his stuntman?!"

"Is this a sex thing?"

A vampire using ground pepper on his new victim.