Shopping Critics T-Shirts

Valu-Mart Price Scanner: Piece of Junk.

'Dang, you were right! It is formal!'

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

"This is a big seller, and we get them cheap...from China."

Pam learned the importance of browser support.

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

'Can you wear something quieter than those old corduroys?'

'I've got one of those wobbly forwards trolleys!'

"I think your tailor has seriously miscalculated your rise, Herbert."

GM Foods.

How to recognize a German tourist...

'I tried on these jeans. I didn't think they were stretch jeans, but they stretched.'

'Isn't it enough to have long hair?'

"This would be perfect! If it were a different style, in a different color, from a different store."

If you don't see what you want, we don't serve your kind here.

The Bob Dole Home-Shopping Network

'What's with kids nowadays and tattoos?'

Style Consultant

End Of Consumer Confidence Sale

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. . . already marked down for clearance and it's not even Halloween yet."

Man in carriage waiting for shopping wife

Financial Christmas

"Well, I think they fit perfectly."

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

"My tailor just won't accept that I've grown as a person."

The way I look at it...give a man a fish and you got a potential customer. Teach a man to fish and you lose market share.

'...Proof that once there were small business on Mars!'

"Do you have any camouflage pants? I want to hide my hips."

Canadian PM, Stephen Harper, and Queen Elizabeth II.

"Wow, that dress doesn't leave anything to the imagination. Unfortunately."

"You know what? This new fashion for bare midriffs looks pretty awful on some humans..."