Shop Talk Lover T-Shirts

''Sorry, we get no demand for it'- if I've said that once today, I've said it a hundred times!'

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"It's black, but it's not New York black."

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

"I want that dressing-room mirror fired."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'Cool, a wheel. Now you can take me shopping.'

"We've got an emergency out here, Doctor - a compulsive shopper with buyer's remorse!"

Bob's Heart Valves 'N' Stuff (store is open)

'I remember when it was a row of quaint little coffee bars and boutiques.'

Customer Service - I don't know and I don't care.

'Didn't I tell you? We've decided to go public?'

'All these conferences look the same.'

SAGE (unknown model)

"Remember when all this was free?"

Ladies Lingerie.

Eulogy: I shopped Til I Dropped

'We don't call it 'plus size' anymore, we call it 'extra fun'.'

Pop-up shop...

Does my bank account look big in this?

Store O' Stuff - In Your Face Since 1983

'Business is so bad even the shoplifters have stopped coming.'

'I have this--wow! I must have THIS couch--deep seated envy complex...'

"I'm thinking of becoming a personal shopper." "What's that?" "It's where you buy things for people who are too busy to go shopping themselves." "I mean, I love to shop. I love it more than almost anything." "They say if you love your work, you never 'work' a day in your life." "To each his own, I guess." "I love everything about shopping. From the seductive 'OPEN' sign, to the supple checkout lines."

You spend all day comparison shopping, and you end up with THIS stuff?

'Don't just sit there-there's an articulated lorry wants unloading outside!'

Razor Salesman

The Corner Shop.

Ahh, excellent! I've finally found a tie that matches my eyes!

'If you're going shopping, collect some taxes on the way back.'