Shelving And Decor Enthusiast Pillows

Hey! Built-ins! Carpenter Ants: Best-Case Scenario.

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"Man's best friends."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

Cat statues on entrance gate

"You're welcome."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

Board Game Hunter

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Posh Easter Egg

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

'Did they deliver the new couch today?'

King Madras

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

Ok, now the Swedish mouse is just showing off. IKEA maze.

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."