Settlement Seeker T-Shirts

Lawyer to client: 'I don't mean to offend you by the wording, but I have to ask if you want your payment in a lump sum.'

"It doesn't matter if anyone heard you fall, I am sure we can get you a large cash settlement."

"After a million dollar settlement, his widow gave it to me as a trophy."

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

'This might be the common ground we've been looking for.'

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

Pony Rides

'He wants to close the deal with a handshake. What do you think about that?'

"I like this Carl, you've come up with more solutions than we have problems."

Welcome to Everest! No Loitering.

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

"The problem with your reasoned solutions is they don't fit my preconceived notions of the problems."

'Think tank' and 'Rethink tank'.

Mountain climbers find a family picnicing on top of the mountain

Old Joe was determined to reach the summit as he'd left his false teeth up there last week!

'I have nobody else to blame but myself so we need to brainstorm.'

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

'Let it go. Get on with your death.'

We can't go on meeting like this...

"You are Here" sign on mountain.

"I'd prefer a win-win solution – but I'm open to just a win."

Man with lots of hair, holding a bottle of hair tonic waits outside of the patents office.

Retrospection.

My resolution this year? Getting in shape so I can lift my favorite snacks!

Avoiding eternal damnation since 1982

"But am I happy? Very."

'Unfortunately we're approaching the expiration dates on most of our quick-fix solutions.'

'Well, we've divided an elegant solution. Do we have any elegant problems?'

Metaphors.

'It's a great country kid, anyone can grow up to be security to the president.'

Air Pollution Agency - 'Tell them I have the solution to most of their problems.'