Service Station Enthusiasts Gifts

Git It 'N' Git

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Here's something extra to cover his lousy tip. Blame his fifth grade math teacher."

'The customer is always right...'

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"Nap time."

DIY Butchers

"Your confirmation number is 7913842461. To hear this information again press 1."

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

Fast Food Restaurant

'Hi, my name's Mandy and I'll be your culturally inappropriate annoyance this evening.'

"I'm having a little difficulty adjusting. The last place I worked was a lot bigger."

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

"How is it you can commit to world class service but not to me?"

"Thanks for waiting."

"We've found the problem. You folks don't own a car."

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

"Hang on hon. A table with a more expensive tab needs me."

Boy cleaning servant's shoes

"If you seek the bathroom key, answer first these riddles three."

'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'

'We'll rotate them for free but you have to pay if you want 'em balanced.'

'I never get tipped!'

Coffee shop request for tea in china cup.

'Maybe complimentary refills wasn't such a good idea.'

"Faux wood grain towel dispensers, matching toilet plunbers, herb scented urinal cakes, where's it all end, Stan?"

Complaints department

'I appreciate your enthusiasm in serving me but I never tip more than 15 percent.'

'I told you the waiter would remember you gave him a 2 cent tip the last time.'

"Opening a restaurant, eh? What kind?" "Self-service."

Butler and Page Boy

All charged up and nowhere to go.

'Are you out of your mind - can't you see I'm buying gas.'

Charity for Petrol.

"We're out of tuna fish, but the kid in table six said you can have a bite of his tuna sandwich."