Service Satisfaction Seeker Pillows

"Perhaps you're to blame for having unrealistic expectations."

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

There is nothing more satisfying that peeling the film off a brand new building.

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Find out that man's name and give him a rise.

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

"I've had enough sweets for one day."

Job complaints on road signs.

'I used to be an accountant but I found it too depressing.'

"In two weeks' time, Andy Murray will either have achieved a great British win or an awful Scottish defeat."

"We try to treat volunteers like regular members of staff, impossible workloads and no resources."

Cut out and keep your own Room Service.

'I do the work of three men...how about giving one of us a decent salary?'

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'No Mam. The service charge does not include a change of oil.'

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

"Er! So apart from the crushing workload, lack of support, weak and ineffective management, poor conditions and lack of flexibility was there anything in particular you didn’t like about working here?"

'Our customer service was lousy, but from now on, we'll give the personal touch. Let's write to 'Hey lassies and dudes, what's up?'

"It's new. It's called a pre-tip. You pay me now and I'll actually bring your food before it's cold!"

'For a nominal sum I simply pass through your offices every day to show your employees how good they have it.'

Your Sculpture while you wait.

"I always choose immediate gratification over vague rewards at some unspecified time in the future."

'Waiter, your tip's getting cold.'

"Winners don't leave Yelp reviews."

I enjoy my job, that's why I'm saving some for tomorrow.

"This is great!! Now, what's the bad news?"

"I had to bite him once, but now I always get a great table."

Great customer care is not optional.

'This restaurant is great They always keep my water glass full,'

"I love it when it all comes together... not like now of course."

"When this is all done, I'd like to try something a little different. Maybe work with children.

"I'm only in it for the money. Is that normal?"