Senior Support Seeker T-Shirts

'I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

Handle With Care

"Did you remember my mints?"

Senior Partner works at a desk, sign on wall behind her says 'Ms. Davis senior partner - formerly: 'Hey You'.

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

"No more swinging from tree to tree! Now I take the bus and I even get a senior discount!"

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

'When you look at me do you see a woman or a senior partner?'

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

"I've made a list of lists we need to make."

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

'I should have told you, every Friday senior partners get to do the Prosecco Polonaise.'

"I'd like to see you every Tuesday, forever."

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

"And this is my life support system."

'I believe in you, Jeffrey, and I believe in Al Gore.'

Bed Sores and Breakfast - Palliative care.

"That's Roger's therapy dog."

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

Amnesia Support Group: Meeting Today!

"Seasonal depression and existential depression and political depression for the trifecta."

"I love group...however, I don't feel that everyone honors my right to express my fears."

woman works at a desk with a sign on the wall behind her: Ms. Davis Senior Partner - Formerly Hey You.

"Marie, are you still driving?"

'Prove it.'

"It all started with my addiction to crackers, then crackers and cheese, which led to crackers, cheese and wine! But thanks to AA meetings, I've turned my life around. . ."

"We're convinced you'll make a lousy senior partner, but you beat everybody else in the brownnosing department."

"If you ask me, we're better off without her."

Ms. Davis Senior Partner - Formerly: Hey You.

'Your mother has finally found a home she wants us to put her in...ours.'

Leaning on a friend